Author Topic: Retarded Teachers  (Read 269 times)

Offline Krush Jeanjacket

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Retarded Teachers
« on: June 18, 2019, 10:03:06 pm »
Talk about the people in your life who weren't qualified to teach anyone anything but miraculously slipped through the cracks

One woman taught the history of the Cold War in HS. In her 40s, no kids as far as I can remember. She mispronounced many basic words. Proudly discussed her trips to China and showed off her little red book. Told the class the death toll in the Soviet Union was greatly exaggerated. Spent a week discussing the evils of McCarthyism but didn't discuss the Vietnam war at all, aside from how the Vietnamese are statistically the happiest people on Earth post-communism.

Another woman taught economics. Recent college grad, slut-eyes, ex party girl. Half of class time spent watching YouTube videos. Once argued with her when she insisted Disney "changed the design of Mickey Mouse." I told her Mickey is an icon, like Jesus or Superman. Her only retort was that I was wrong, took great pleasure in the little authority she had over me.

Community college sociology professor that looked like his corgi that he liked to show the class. He taught a course called "Society and Technological Change." Wore bowties, thick glasses, sweater vest. 5'4". Very clearly medicated. Had zero passion for the material whatsoever despite it being fascinating and crucially relevant. Somehow managed to weave the teachings of Marx into his curriculum.

Shouts out to my old boomer latin teacher who was a sugar daddy to many south american women. I remember Nick mentioning on one of the talking cars hydewars eps that that only boomers worthy of respect are the ones who checked out of society in the 60s and never went back, and he was one of those guys.

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Retarded Teachers
« on: June 18, 2019, 10:03:06 pm »

Offline Lucid

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #1 on: June 18, 2019, 10:19:57 pm »
I had an econ teacher with early onset dementia that spent the first half of the quarter discussing absolutely nothing to do with econ. He went on multi day long rants about chem trails and how global warming was a communist conspiracy to redistribute wealth to the 3rd world. Looking back on it the dude kind of ruled.

Offline Mind Jelqer

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #2 on: June 18, 2019, 10:50:59 pm »
When I was in elementary school I had an ex-military teacher who wouldn't let me come into class almost the entire year. My first day of class he was looking at my file in front of me and just said, "I see we're going to have problems," and then said something else bitchy that I can't remember and couldn't really understand either at the time. I was totally confused by his statements. He'd force me to go out into the field and run. I wouldn't be allowed back into the class until I vomited. He would leave class during quiet moments to make sure I was still running. I eventually got so good at running that I never vomited. I ran for hours almost every day that year except for when I was in my RSP period because I was pretending to have a learning disorder so that I could have an excuse for not doing my homework. (I stopped giving a fuck about school altogether after I got kidnapped) Maybe he knew the con I was running. I doubt it though. Once when he was super pissed at the class he kicked somebodies backpack straight into my friend's face. Another time he flipped over a desk with a girl still in it while he was stomping over to another kid who pissed him off.

I was a constantly brooding and quiet child. I wouldn't tell my dad about what he was doing to me until he starting fucking with me even more toward the end of the year. I eventually realized there was nothing I could do about it otherwise. I refused to break because I hated the fuck out of him and he refused to stop fucking with me. My dad came to the school and made him look like a bitch in front of a bunch of the staff including the principal. He wasn't allowed to make people run after that.

A couple years later I had an Algebra teacher who wouldn't shut the fuck up about how Disney was hiding penises and the word "sex" in all of their animated movies. Her husband was ex-military and she would vent all of her problems with him to us. "He just comes home and drinks, because that's what guys in the military do. I'm thinking of separating from him, taking the kids." Sometimes she would cry. She screamed at us a lot. I was in her class for two hours a day because I refused to learn math, then later I was in her class on Saturdays. So many of her students were failing Algebra she started working Saturdays to unfuck everything. It probably wouldn't have been a problem if she focused on teaching the class instead of telling stories. I was fucking up on purpose but a lot of those kids were actually trying.

In highschool I had a film studies teacher who would always have her phone going off while we were watching movies and taking notes. She would suddenly start crying often and walk out of the class. Our semester final film projects got fucked. We were doing oldschool analogue editing and those got fucked up somehow for our first semester project. For our second semester project some asshole came in one day and stole every single Macbook that we were editing them on. She never made any backups. I failed that class because I was pissed that my projects were ruined and didn't want to do some essay on film to make up for them. I had to do an extra semester of highschool to make up for a failed semester of film lmao.

I was a retard too tho, always shooting myself in the foot just to rebel.
« Last Edit: June 18, 2019, 11:02:44 pm by Mind Jelqer »

Offline franktjmaxx

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #3 on: June 19, 2019, 12:03:26 am »
I was the only kid in my Latin 4 class but because it was in the same room as the Latin 2 and 3 kids I just got assigned the Latin 3 work. She got fired before the year ended for getting in a fight with a student

Offline Lucid

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #4 on: June 19, 2019, 02:20:06 am »
(I stopped giving a fuck about school altogether after I got kidnapped)

You got kidnapped???

Offline Winky(AFK 6 Months)

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #5 on: June 19, 2019, 04:34:58 am »
I was the only kid in my Latin 4 class but because it was in the same room as the Latin 2 and 3 kids I just got assigned the Latin 3 work. She got fired before the year ended for getting in a fight with a student

Are you talking about classical Latin? Like Ovid and crap? Or is it some sort of American way of saying "Spanish", like "Latina". I took three semesters of classical Latin, there were only two but I failed the second time. I improved my grade by 20 points the next time around but at the cost of my dear brain. But I loved learning it overall.

Offline Mind Jelqer

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #6 on: June 19, 2019, 07:44:37 am »
You got kidnapped???

Yeah lmao. It's not really all that interesting. Just dramatic.  My parents divorced when I was a baby and my mom abandoned me a little while after she got custody. She decided later she wanted us back.  My mom is crazy as fuck and evil too. She ending up getting away with my sisters for good after her second attempt. I'm over it now.

Offline PunchingArianaGrande

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #7 on: June 19, 2019, 10:57:56 am »
The stupidest teacher I ever had was a science teacher I had when I was 13, but he was notorious throughout the school. He told us earth was hurtling through space at thousands of miles an hour. I asked if we went up in a rocket and just floated for a few minutes, would we get lost, and he said yes. All my other teachers were pretty good in general, nothing crazy.

Offline robot randy

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #8 on: June 19, 2019, 08:54:42 pm »
had a really shitty english teacher in grade 10 that outright refused to attempt to pronounce any of the names in crime and punishment, to the point where everyone in the class made it a point to pronounce them correctly when they were reading aloud

she may or may not have been in a vintage porno, despite seeing the film in question the quality was too poor to say whether or not it was her for certain

a former student also confided in me and some friends that he had hidden a dead squirrel in the drop tile ceiling of her classroom the day before spring break. i was never able to verify his claims but the circumstances in which he presented the information to us leads me to believe he was telling the truth

Offline franktjmaxx

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #9 on: June 19, 2019, 10:45:18 pm »
Are you talking about classical Latin? Like Ovid and crap?

Ye classical Latin, but not even Ovid, it was chapters from a textbook Ecce Romani. Occasionally she assigned things like the Vulgate and stuff by Caesar but for the most part its shit like "Raeda in fossa est. Raedarius Cornelium vexat."
« Last Edit: June 19, 2019, 10:49:57 pm by franktjmaxx »

Offline _jim_

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #10 on: June 19, 2019, 11:53:24 pm »
history teacher who had a walrus moustache and used to wear bowler hats to class. typical boomer who was old enough to start justifying his weird personality traits, used to exuded supreme autistic confidence which i admired a lot. did some mean impressions of the US presidents. despite all of this he didn't teach shit. he was way too whimsical and did too much hand waving without providing a lot of concrete arguments.

in retrospect the most interesting personality was this 30 year old american guy who taught me english for 3 years. real patrick swayze jock kinda guy, 6' with striations like a rock. used to have these manic mood swings where one day he would not say a single word the whole lesson and then the next week have a manic break and go on these massive sam hdye style rants. no kidding. i'm talking like sam hyde @ rutgers where he emphasised points by slamming his pen into the wall creating these little divets, pacing around the room pointing his finger and dancing and just saying whatever came to his mind. he was fucking woke for sure. he did this long speech in front of my year group about the importance of reading. described how he used to hate reading until he read like satre @ age 18 or something then became obsessed (definitely to score pewsey in college). used to selectively mock students in my class who fit typical highschool student archetypes: dnd/wow nerds, footy jocks, beach kids, future irony bros/pseuds. never taught me anything interesting nor provided any interesting insight into any of the lit we read, purely existed as this mentally fucked up spectacle for our whole class to laugh at.
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Offline Winky(AFK 6 Months)

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #11 on: June 20, 2019, 01:17:48 am »
had a really shitty english teacher in grade 10 that outright refused to attempt to pronounce any of the names in crime and punishment, to the point where everyone in the class made it a point to pronounce them correctly when they were reading aloud

she may or may not have been in a vintage porno, despite seeing the film in question the quality was too poor to say whether or not it was her for certain

a former student also confided in me and some friends that he had hidden a dead squirrel in the drop tile ceiling of her classroom the day before spring break. i was never able to verify his claims but the circumstances in which he presented the information to us leads me to believe he was telling the truth

My English teacher literally didn't show up to class half the time in grade 10. Some student must have mentioned it to their parents and the parent freaked out on the principal, then the English teacher came in all pissed off one day because he actually had to do his job. His nice, unionized, summers off job. lol. incredible

Offline Winky(AFK 6 Months)

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #12 on: June 20, 2019, 01:22:43 am »
Are you talking about classical Latin? Like Ovid and crap?

Ye classical Latin, but not even Ovid, it was chapters from a textbook Ecce Romani. Occasionally she assigned things like the Vulgate and stuff by Caesar but for the most part its shit like "Raeda in fossa est. Raedarius Cornelium vexat."

I am incredibly lazy with Latin because it requires a good bit of mental diligence to be nimble with it, but when I was in the swing of things and when I was able to translate reasonably well, I got enormous pleasure out of translating Ovid into English.

I still keep up with Latin and read a Latin dictionary. I have a grammar book, a reader, a book completely in Latin etc, I keep it at work and for a lot of the year I read it every morning.

Certain aspects of Latin I'm not really gonna forget like the verb tenses, declensions and most word endings etc, so I try to keep my grammar somewhat maintained. I do aspire to achieve a proficiency with it sometime in this life.

One of my Latin teachers was this guy from Estonia or something, and he was a bit of a dick, he'd make you pronounce the Latin words even though it had nothing to do with your grade, and the prick would laugh at me with the other students when I did a hachet job on it. Hell during the final exam, I had like an hour left scheduled for the exam, everyone else had finished up and he was like doing this European cough thing, to try and suggest that I should finish up and past in my test so I could fail the semester. I took my time, passed it in and failed. I got a better teacher on the next go around and walked out of that course with a 65.

Offline MommyBuster69

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #13 on: June 22, 2019, 11:59:23 pm »
I got sent to the bad kid school in my junior year, so I always grovel and think of positive things about authority figures, because they would punish me for the slightest shit, and I just gave up, and did whatever they wanted. I had a teacher who looked like the killer from wolf creek. He was like a proto-Proud Boy type, and talked about how great his wife was, and how he hated how husbands on TV were always portrayed as idiots. He really believed in the students there even though they all were pretty fucking dim losers.

Offline ralph

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #14 on: July 01, 2019, 11:18:20 pm »
Had a really cool physics teacher in highschool that only taught because he was too stupid to get a phd and do research.  He was very subtly racist against the chinese exchange students and would exclusively shock them during the static electricity unit

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Re: Retarded Teachers
« Reply #14 on: July 01, 2019, 11:18:20 pm »

 


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